Here's the thing:
Dirty Bingo (aka White Elephant) should actually be called Dirty, Dirty Bingo in my family. Last year Joel wrapped a dead crab in a box of sand, and Hooters cards were viciously stolen over and over. This year, tension were high - what would the Rouches be up to now?

Among the stack of 30 gifts was one REALLY BIG wrapped box. We all steered clear of it, thinking the Rouches probably brought it, and it was probably full of tons of packaging for a dead fish or something.

Dirty Bingo voting: to open or to leave wrapped?
(Burt and Sean like the element of surprise. They lost.)

Burt gets a harmonica, which his wife Alene later stole. Smart.

Joel goes through more 7-11 Slurpees a day than humanly possible, so Sean and I bought this jug with the intention of Joel stealing it. Which he did.

Bradley with two sets
of PJs
 

Burt later gets a nice sweatshirt

Ben's on a mission
 

And there were many slippers

Which are always a hit
 

Not only did Grandpa also get slippers

He even got a TOE RING!
 

He wore it proudly

Lovely, no?

Julie and Ben got skateboards

Which were a hit

Only to be stolen and replaced with
a manicure set

Kay got nose hair clippers

Keith got Godiva chocolates, which Sean stole (thank you Baby)

Whenever it was someone's turn to open a gift, we'd all yell "The big one!! The BIG one!" Then they'd choose anything but the big one, and we'd go "Awwww."
Until.
Little Lukas picked the big one.
It took quite a while for him to unwrap, untape, and unstaple.
And the gift was:
Dylan
That's right - Jamey wrapped Dylan in a box, hauled him up the stairs and into Herb & Karyn's condo, and there he stayed for an hour and fifteen minutes, silently waiting, drenched in sweat, for someone to open "the big one."
Lukas was feeling pretty ripped off, as Dylan was his brother, so actually he already had Dylan, but then Dylan handed Lukie a ten dollar bill and all was well again.
I tell ya, Dylan earned his stripes with the cousins that night.
He is now a man in our eyes.
Strange, though - as Lukie was eyeballing the big box, at that moment I turned to Nancy and said "Where's Dylan?" (with thirty people it takes quite a while to figure out someone's missing). She said "Oh, he isn't feeling well." and I nodded.
At the same time as that conversation, Lukie was looking at the big box and Todd shouted "Look! It's has breathing holes!"
Still, no one figured it out.
Herb and Karyn had a hunch because it was quite the ruckus getting Dylan, already wrapped in the box, up the stairs and into the condo.
I laughed so hard I was crying.

Todd got boxers and Chip Clips

And he used both

Nancy liked the boxers too

Val proceeds with caution opening another Rouch gift

Smell check

A People-Killing Wrench!

Wes gets PJs and a hat

Fitting

Alene gets a tool mug

Packages are dwindling

The same awful tote bag from last year

This is Todd. Todd is a Phi Delt.
Todd is drinking a cosmopolitan.

This is Nancy. She let her kid get wrapped in a box for over an hour.
She is a total stud.
Pictures from the Catch Phrase game earlier that night.